I’ve not blogged for quite some time now and had been thinking recently on where it is going, if anywhere. Then coincidentally I had a conversation on Twitter last week, which involved exactly what I had been thinking about. My recent thoughts & feelings were neatly summed up by Bethan Mair Edwards (@pixiegirle): Recovery as an Identity.
My blog has been a very helpful outlet for me and a way to think things through. I’ve had incredible support and encouragement from people through the comments on here and also on Twitter. I even won the 2014 TWIM Award in the Recovery Category, which was somewhat strange and flattering. However, that in a way is part of why I am probably saying farewell to this blog.
I’ve been thinking how I no longer feel it appropriate to link significant events or changes in my life to recovery. I have recovered from BPD and I am learning to live with a diagnosis of Bipolar. My life isn’t about recovery anymore, it isn’t about rebuilding a life. I have a life, I enjoy it. I have difficulties with my mental health condition but I am learning to live with it, and currently I’m well. I don’t want to be identified as the “person in recovery” or for anything enjoyable to be considered a “recovery event”. It’s my life and I feel this constant relation to recovery detracts from that. I’m me, I have a life, I have difficulties; this is to do with living, not recovery.
I’m not sure I’m even properly explaining myself but I suppose it’s about having a life with the normal trials and tribulations + my additional difficulties due to what they label as Bipolar. I own that life, recovery doesn’t. As such, I am saying farewell. I am also saying a massive thank you for all who have supported me. Thank you!